Posts Tagged ‘beliefs’

I had been with my last boyfriend for over 4.5 years. Many of his traditional Catholic family expected that we would get married then start having kids. And he had the same future belief for us as his family did. Sadly, our relationship had to come to an end because I understood his reasons for wanting kids; they were completely contradicting my future lifestyle beliefs (even though I was also baptized Catholic).

• He wanted to experience taking care of a helpless kid – I didn’t want to devote my time and effort to someone other then my relationship
• He wanted to provide for a kid and give her the life he didn’t have – I want to enrich my own life because that is what my parents provided to me
• He was an only child and wants to have a dual child family – I had a younger brother whom I helped rear and I do not want to do it again
• He knows it’s going to be hard work and dedication – I dedicate my life to my partner and work hard at my career and our relationship
• He wants someone to look up to him and look to him for answers – I think it’s silly that people have to create someone that looks up to them whereas I build up my personal and professional relationships with my peers

These types of things are internal desires that he feels he needs to fulfill in order to live a full life. I, on the other hand, feel that caring for children is not all that it’s made up to be. I’m not going to try and convince him my way is right. Neither should he and his family try to convince me their way is right. The idea of doing what’s right is founded by societal, religious and family presures, but I choose to pick my own “right”. Now please stop trying to convince me of something I don’t believe.

Interesting fact: I find that people who think “you have to have kids” are the most close minded people I’ve met.