I would rather be responsible for being on birth control then believing the guy is doing everything right. Since I would be the one having to deal with the “mistake” I’d rather prevent any mistakes before they start.
The types of birth control I’ve practiced varies:
- The Pill (Yaz, Ortho Tri-cyclen Lo, Loestrin)
- The NuvaRing
- A diaphragm
- Birth control patch
- Female condom / male condom
- Coitus Interruptus
And I refuse to use the shot or the implants. eww creepy
The type of birth control I really want to use is to have an IUD. But because of my age and the fact that I never had given birth, the people at Planned Parenthood don’t really want me to use it. And that makes me very sad…they don’t want to make me happy. Maybe I should give them an ultimatum; either give me ParaGard or Sterilize me permanently. Then we’ll see what they say. muahaha
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A 20-something with a childfree lifestyle choice – stories, resources and support. Enjoy!
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How old are you, if you don’t mind my asking?
I’m not sure of the community, but if you are a member of cf_hardcore on LJ they can point you to it: People are building a directory of docs who are either good or bad about long term contraceptives & sterilizations.
hey you should double check with people about IUDs, they are being used in a lot more cases these days for people who are younger and have not had children! Its possible your PP staff is hesitant about them, but you should take control, get the info, and tell them it’s what you want and need.
Personally im a fan of the paraguard=10 years of no babies, check the strings once a month, in-office procedure, and NO HORMONES. this are all awesome reasons to give it some consideration. I have several friends in their early 20s who have this IUD and all love it.
:)
OMFG. That’s the EXACT same reason I was not given IUD info, at the same age. I’m 37 now, and on the stupid goddamn loestrin pill, and I’ve HAD IT. Had. It.
I’ve wanted tubal ligation since age 24. Nobody ever would give me info on it.
I just learned recently my one dear internet pal, who currently has her 4th kid (and loving her life choice, which I respect)…got offered her first opportunity at tubal ligation at -
- wait for it -
Age 19! After her first kid!
She was FLOORED that I haven’t been given info on sterilization over the years, considering how easily it was offered to her, and thought it sucked.
This is fucking ridiculous.
I’ve had my period since age 11 1/2, got on b/c pills around age 18 when I became sexually active, got preggo at one point when I quit taking the pill, had an abortion because the women’s clinic that did abortions at the time LEGALLY COULD NOT ADVERTISE ABOUT THE MORNING AFTER PILL. AT ALL. I didn’t even KNOW they had it until I called to make my initial appointment after peeing on a goddamn stick…their on-hold message mentioned the morning after pill. This is back in the mid-1990′s in Pennsylvania.
But what if I want kiiiids?
If I got knocked up now, RIGHT NOW, my kid to be would be 14 when I’m 52. I’m sorry, but this is LUDICROUS.
I am going down to Planned Parenthood here in Chicago this week, and finding out what I can do about a tubal or essure. I DO NOT CARE WHAT IT COSTS. I KNOW MY OWN MIND AND I AM DONE DONE DONE WITH THIS BULLSHIT.
Also, my own xbf wanted kids someday and I just wasn’t sure. That was one of our (many) reasons for our breakup. He’ll be a great father for someone else’s kid someday, actually, he’ll be a great dad. I just couldn’t do that for him.
Thank you hikikomorihime. I have looked into that LJ community, started an account and have requested to join. Your suggested resource is greatly appreciated!
(I’m 27 years old)
Shelly,
You are right about some PP staff being hesitant. But after going to 4 different offices, I think I’ve found one that might be able to help me be happy. And I am ecstatic that you are a pro-ParaGuard user! I love this non-hormonal option because I think this will keep me a bit more sane at times. LOL
LadyJaneWriter, your story hurts me. These actions (or lack of actions on the dr. part) makes me feel like women are still looked after and told what to do. I say, GO FOR IT. Take a trip to your local PP and see how things are now, and share what you come up with.
I don’t really blame PP for being hesitant… for all I (don’t) know these IUD’s could cost them $$$ when they have to be picky about the people who receive it when on the low income “teal card”. I bet if I had the money and had a regular obgyn dr. that receives medical insurance comps, that I’d be able to get an IUD or tubiligation more easily.
And going back to your story about the 19 year old being offered an IUD, that is prolly a viable candidate for the PP’s selection process. However, I do understand your frustration and I am hurt that you’ve had this ongoing experience for this long. Much Strength to You!
The IUDs can cause very nasty side effects, which for some reason aren’t really talked about, unlike the side effects of hormonal contraception. The body doesn’t really like foreign things being stuck inside of it, especially in a place like that. I’ve read quite a few medical papers about IUD complications and some I couldn’t even read through, because they were so gross even Stephen King couldn’t have made them up!
So, I would never use an IUD myself. Luckily I’ve had no problems with the pill, though I still worry a bit about getting pregnant, and also about thrombosis.
The birth control pill. Yaz, has been linked to life-threatening side effects such as strokes, blood clots, and heart attacks. Since 2004, at least 50 deaths have been reported in women taking Yaz and contraceptives made with similar ingredients. There is more information on this disturbing problem at http://www.yaz-may-cause-strokes.com/.
I’m glad you’ve read a lot about the con’s about IUD use. Actually, that is ALL that I find. Personal stories about women who swear up and down that the hormonal IUD makes them gain weight, have mood swings… And with all IUDs the string is disturbing to the mate and has cause some serious internal injury to some women…. etc… etc… the list goes on.
I’m happy the pill is working for you. So many people don’t have issues the hormones and that is the most awesome-est discovery evrar!
The birth control pill, Yaz, has been linked to strokes, heart attacks, and other adverse events. There is some valuable information here: http://www.yaz-may-cause-strokes.com/.
I had the Norplant (two times) for a total of 10 years and I LOVED it. That was from 3-0-40 because they wouldn’t do a tubal OR let my husband get a Vasectomy because we “might” want to have kids adn that is permanent. We both knew early in our relationship that we agreed that we didn’t want children, but our desires didn’t matter.
And even when hubby finally was able to get a V, I had to sign off because we didn’t have kids. I was FORTY years old, he was forty years old. But it’s all about people suing Dr’s because they changed their mind.
Good luck with your choices. The IUD’s they offer today are much better than the old ones and are as safe as BC Pills, Implants, Nuvo Ring, patches, etc. They all have their side effects and you can find negative info on all of them, but if you really want an IUD, tell your OB that is what you have decided and that you insist. YOU are the patient/customer.
Good luck.
Thank you Elisa for sharing your story. I am hoping that I will have better luck with getting an IUD since I am going to be seeing a PAID obgyn and not the Planned Parenthood’s anymore (now that I got my promotion and medical insurance).
Maija, not ALL IUD’s are hormonal… I just battled with some hormonal issues of my own and know that hormonal b/c (outside of depo shots) would just aggravate things for me and put me in a world of pain all over again. Paragard is a non-hormonal IUD. That’s what I’m on now… True, I don’t much like the idea of having a foreign object in my body, but then again, I’d feel even MORE opposed to it if that foreign object was a fetal growth, you know what I mean? *LMAO* If I HAD a CHOICE…I WOULD BE STERILIZED! I WOULD HAVE BEEN STERILIZED YEARS AGO if I had my way…But EVERY TIME I’ve ASKED for a doctor’s help, I get turned away…bitches…
Wow LadyJaneWriter…19??? Can you refer me to that doc? *lol* Seriously…Damn!!! Actually, when I look back on my childhood, I keep uncovering memories that show me I was a CF even when I was a child… I recall when people would announce when they were expecting a baby, I would ALWAYS be the one to NOT congratulate…even ask WHY congratulations were even in order??? And when I was 10, I remember scrounging for change to start a savings to get myself a hysterectomy as soon as I turned 18…Yeah, that’s freaking hardcore *lol*. Of course, I know now how extreme that is…but it goes to show that being CF is just part of who I am and always will be…
I’m curious if knowing that you want to live a childfree life early on has an coloration to upbringing?
I tried everything, too, until I got a tubal ligation in my 30′s (at which time I was like – Wow, I wish I had done this a LOT sooner.) I tried an IUD at about your age and it caused all kinds of horrible complications including a bladder infection, which I would not wish on my worst enemy! I hope you can get it all worked out so you are happy with whatever method you use.
I got my Paragard IUD at age 24. I wasn’t married yet at the time or even dating the man I did marry, but I did have an established gynecologist who I convinced to do the procedure. A doctor should advise you and make you aware of the facts and potential dangers but they shouldn’t deny you treatment. If they do, find a new one.
When I got my IUD I had an HMO but it wasn’t covered under them. I purchased it online directly from the Paragard website and the IUD was shipped to my doctor’s office. He charged me a very low insertion and follow-up fee of $25.00 because the visits having to do with IUD placement weren’t covered either. My doctor is very open-minded and I wouldn’t really want to see anyone else. Again, if yours is pressuring you to conform to their beliefs rather than simply advising you about complications it’s definitely time to move on. This is YOUR body you are dealing with.
This is very interesting. I have had a lot of problems with bcps due to side effects from them. My own doctor was the one who suggested that I try an IUD even though I’ve never had kids. I had heard that you shouldn’t if you haven’t had children, and she told me it’s more painful if you haven’t had children but it’s not a reason to not have the IUD if you want one. I opted not to do so, because my husband instead offered to have a vasectomy (and was given one with no questions or issues at age 30, which just showed me how different it is for men to request sterilization than women. Neither of us wants kids, or I wouldn’t have married him!) I’m not sure if this has anything to do with the fact that my doctor was fairly young and very open-minded (she knew we didn’t want kids and was trying everything in her power to help me figure out birth control when hormonal replacements gave me so many problems), but maybe you could find a younger doctor who is understanding. (I never asked, but maybe my doctor was childfree as well, because she was so understanding with me and my husband when we came in together to talk about our options. Maybe it was just this particular practice, since my husband’s doctor was there, too, and he didn’t have any eyebrows raised about his vasectomy request, even though I was in my late 20s and he was 30. I didn’t have to sign anything either, which is a ridiculous thing to require anyway. If my husband goes behind my back to have a vasectomy, there are worse things going on in our marriage than whether or not we have kids…)
[...] of my thoughts about the non-hormonal IUD and the troubles I went through just to get it. Since I've use numerous birth control methods, I am so glad I was finally able to get this IUD as an alternative to female [...]